IMPORTANCE OF A MAN AND HIS HOME

“Unless the Lord builds the house, its builders labor in vain. Unless the Lord watches over the city, the watchmen stand guard in vain.” Psalm 127:1,2
If our love for Christ is real it will usually prove itself at home among those who know us best. (or at our worst). 
1. YOUR HEADSHIP
God placed man as the head of the home. “Now I want you to realize that the head of every man is Christ, and the head of the woman is man, and the head of Christ is God.” I Corinthians 11:3 (MAN – HEAD)
“For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior.” Ephesians 5:23 (GOD ORDAINED)
Being the head means taking hold of authority. Men are to be the head. BUT – there is also to be mutual submission (?). Ephesians 5:21. To submit means to obey, put under. It is a choice. Men – your wife is not to be a doormat!
A PRAYER FOR THE HEAD OF THE HOME. Psalm 101:2-7 (The Living Bible)
“I will try to walk a blameless path, but how I need your help, especially in my own home, where I long to act as I should. Help me to refuse the low and vulgar things; help me to abhor all crooked deals of every kind, to have no part in them. I will not tolerate anyone who slanders his neighbors; I will not permit conceit and pride. I will make the godly of the land my heroes and invite them to my home. Only those who are truly good shall be my servants. But I will not allow those who deceive and lie to stay in my home.”
2. YOUR LEADERSHIP 
Leadership is cooperating with and complimenting others. 
“A leader is a Person, who influences People to accomplish a Purpose.”- Howard Hendricks,
“Leadership is a man or woman of vision, who can communicate that vision in such a way to inspire people to accomplish a purpose.” – Bill Hybels,
“Leadership is the ability to get a person to do what you want him to do, when you want it done, the way you want it done, because he wants to do it.” –Dwight D. Eisenhower
Sometimes the best way for a man to manage his home is to realize that his wife is the best manager, and let her do it.
Five Standards of Leadership:
I Timothy 4:12 – “Don’t let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith and in purity.”
Speech – Romans 16:18; Colossians 4:6
Life – I Peter 2:12
Love – John 15:12,13; I John 4:19-21
Faith – Matthew 5:16
Purity – Psalm 24:3,4 
3. YOUR MARRIAGE
Marriages may be made in heaven, but the maintenance must be done here on earth.
“However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.” Ephesians 5:33
Success in marriage is more than finding the right person – it is also becoming the right person.
I Timothy 6:11 tells us to run away from evil and strive for righteousness, godliness, faith, love, endurance and gentleness.
Hebrews 13:4,5 gives us some of God’s guidelines concerning two of the greatest weaknesses of most men – sex and money.
After Adam had named all the creatures of God’s creation, I can imagine that he might have asked God, Where is mine?
How do you answer the following questions?
Do I love my wife? I mean REALLY love her! Do you show her and tell her you love her? (HOW?)

Why am I to love her?
a. It is God’s command. “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless.” Ephesians 5:25-27
Notice: He loved her, He gave Himself for her, He cleansed her, He presented her to Himself. Husbands, you have a lot to do with your wife being the woman you want her to be.
b. Your prayers depend on it. – “Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers." I Peter 3:7
c. How am I to love her? The same way you love yourself. “In the same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.” Ephesians 5:28

“Do two walk together unless they have agreed to do so?” Amos 3:3
RESULT: The two become one. “For this reason a man will leave his father
and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.” Ephesians 5:31 (LEAVE AND CLEAVE = 1)
d. When am I to love her? ALL THE TIME! “Enjoy life with your wife, whom you love, all the days of this meaningless life that God has given you under the sun. – all your meaningless days. For this is your lot in life and your toilsome labor under the sun.” Ecclesiastes 9:9
Do I respect her? (Honor – Esteem) I Peter 3:7 – Be considerate of her. Be mindful of her.
Do I appreciate her? Does she increase in value to you? Do you love her as much or more than you did when you married her? (DOES SHE INCREASE IN VALUE?)

Do I encourage her? “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves.” Philippians 2:3
To consider means to esteem, signifies to lead, to be the head. Be open – transparent.
Do I provide or meet her needs? “If anyone does not provide for his relatives, and especially for his immediate family, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.” I Timothy 5:8
To provide here means to ‘consider in advance’; her financial needs. But it involves much more; her psychological needs. They are different than yours; her moods – do you know them? ;her spiritual needs ;her physical needs. She has them also, you know. Are you sensitive to her needs? Do you know what turns her on or off romantically? Are you responsive to her when she expresses her sexual desires? (SEXUALLY) (GOD MADE US DIFFERENT). It’s the little things that count the most men.
Are you a priest in your home? A man’s first obedience is to the Lord, but his first ministry is to his family. Do you minister to her? Do you pray with her? Do you lead in devotional time with her? 
4. YOUR CHILDREN
“Teach children how they should live, and they will remember it all their life.” Proverbs 22:6 (Good News) (WALKING IN YOUR STEPS!)
The education of a child begins 20 years before they are born. Our children are like mirrors – they reflect our attitudes and values of life. They imitate us.
Success anywhere else can never compensate for failure at home.
Are you a leader or a driver? Do you demand respect or earn it? What kind of example are you to your children. Do you confess your mistakes – apologize – to them? James 5:16. Try it the next time you fail one of them. Children are very forgiving.
“For what is a man profited, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul? (Children) or what shall a man give in exchange for his soul? ”. Matthew 16:26
1. Your son.
Are you an example for him of what a godly man is? Truthfulness – Honesty – Keeping your word
Do you spend time with him?
Do you talk to him on his level? Honestly – Frankly
Do you answer his questions?
We save our boys by giving them a role model to follow. It is our job to save the boys. It is our God-appointed task to insure that our son(s) will be ready to lead a family. Sons are the fathers of tomorrow.
Are you transparent before your children – or – are you a transient parent, just passing through. No man ever really finds out what he believes until he begins instructing his children. Ephesians 6:4 – Raise them to love the Lord.
Psalm 78:72 – Do it with integrity of heart; with credibility
2. Your daughter.
Are you setting an example of what she might look for in a husband? Do you let her know she is special? Do you show her what a date should be like?
Do you answer her questions – or do you send her to her mother?
You are the most important man in her young life. Nobody can show her the facets of a good father nearly as well as you can.
3. The sins of the fathers. I Timothy 5:24,25, “The sins of some men are obvious, reaching the place of judgment ahead of them; the sins of others trail behind them. In the same way, good deeds are obvious, and even those that are not cannot be hidden.”
- Sinfulness is hereditary
- Sins are learned
The cumulative or heap effect of sin.
“You show love to thousands but bring the punishment for the father’s sins into the laps of their children after them. O great and powerful God, whose name is the Lord Almighty.” Jeremiah 32:18. Numbers 14:18 – to the third and fourth generation.
Fathers are told in Ephesians 6:4 and Colossians 3:21 not to enrage their children or
cause them to be angry and rebellious.
Are we as fathers putting our children in bondage to our sins? Consider this:
“You shall not bow down to them or worship them (other gods); for I the Lord your God am a jealous God, punishing the children for the sin of the fathers to the third and fourth generation of those who hate men.” Deuteronomy 5:9; Numbers 14:18
The Three “R’s” of Sin.
a. The Reason. – sinful nature – lack of accountability
b. The Result. – broken relationships – powerlessness – bondage.
c. The Remedy (Luke 15:11-24) – The Prodigal Son.
Realization – remorse and brokenness. v.17
Resolution – repentance (a change of mind). v.18
Repentance – renewal and revival. vv.18,19,21
Reconciliation – recommitment and resubmission. v.20
Re-clothing – restoration and reinstatement. vv.22-24
Rejoicing – celebration. v.24b
Your children do not have to believe that you are the wisest man in the entire world to count you as a good father. Just be there for them.