I have always wondered about the role men play in our society and their importance. What is it that makes the men not to perform to their best in the following areas: Physical support, Spiritual growth, Social interactions and Emotional development? After getting certain challenges, I have found out that men coil themselves or go into cocoons and are not ready to face the difficult situations. Some have ditched their families altogether.
There are essential qualities that we can learn from Scriptures that can be very useful in guiding us men to play our rightful roles in the family, society, and nation and even in the Church.
The following are the essential qualities that men can yearn for so that they can be useful to others and be very responsible and you can do an evaluation on yourself on all these qualities:
1. Blameless (1Tim 3:2). Men are leaders and are to be unblamable, having nothing in their lives for which they can be rebuked. (This does not mean that they are sinless.)
2. Husband of one wife (1Tim 3:2). They are to be one-woman men and faithful to their spouses. Fidelity at home begets fidelity to God in the church and the nation.
3. Vigilant (1Tim 3:2). They are to be spiritually stable, watchful and alert, having a clear, biblical perspective of life and are to be self-controlled.
4. Sober (1Tim 3:2). Sometimes that word is translated “sober-minded” or “prudent.” It means they know their priorities and be wise and discreet in their ways. Their priorities are the guiding principles. They don’t follow others blindly.
5. Of good behaviour (1Tim 3:2). Men are to have such well-ordered lives that they are honoured for it and are to be examples for others to follow and particularly the members of their households.
6. Given to hospitality (1Tim 3:2). They are to love strangers, opening their homes for hospitality ministry to those in need and be a blessing to others.
7. Apt to teach (1Tim 3:2). It is not saying that men must be great teachers. It is saying that they must be teachable as well as able to communicate truths to others. The word conveys not only the dynamics of their teaching but also sensitivity to other people. They teach with a meek and gentle spirit. In any case, every man should seek to study the Word of God and know it well.
8. Temperate (Titus 1:8).Men are not to be addicted to alcohol or drugs or craving of any kind. They need to be in control of themselves and be well- disciplined.
9. Not self-willed (Titus 1:7). They should not be self-centred. A nation or Church cannot have people in leadership who are concerned only about themselves. The important thing about men in leadership position is that they be genuinely concerned for the people they are leading.
10. Not soon angry (Titus 1:7). Men cannot have a volatile temperament; they must be patient and have a good disposition and not easily agitated or provoked particularly towards their wives and children.
11. No striker (Titus 1:7). This literally means “not a fighter.” The society and families do not need men who solve problems with their fists.
12. Not a brawler (1Tim 3:3). This attitude corresponds to the physical reaction. A contentious man likes to compete and debate just for the sake of it.
13. Patient (1Tim 3:3). This is one of the facets of the fruit of the Spirit.
14. Not covetous (1Tim 3:3). Men should be free from the love of money or fame or other material or intangible things. Worldly-minded persons disqualify themselves.
15. Rules well his own house (1Tim 3:4). Men are required to keep their children and spouse under control with dignity, and be the heads of the homes.
16. Have a good report of them that are without (1Tim 3:7). What does the world think of the men as they interact with others? Their integrity should be above reproach.
17. Lover of good men (Titus 1:8). They should have good desires and motives and do things with sincerity of heart.
18. Just (Titus 1:8). Men are to be fair and equitable, and not prejudiced against any.
19. Holy (Titus 1:8). They are to be consecrated and sanctified in their lives and committed to the service in the nation and the Church.
20. Not a novice (1 Tim 3:6). They are to be spiritually mature and not a newcomer in the faith.
The above are essential qualities that we can from the Scriptures to guide as in our lives here on earth. Since men many have failed in their respective roles, the society, nation and families have suffered. We need to do a proper evaluation of our roles as men and then do the needful amends. We have to set the best examples and particularly to the boy-child.
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